Uncharitable

CowriesLacking has become all I have.
When will I have enough to give those who lack?
Well, I’m now one of them and my self esteem is split in half.
Not because I’m a beggar walking around with pans.
Not because I’m ashamed or I’ve pursued all my pals with gimme gimme please, I’ll give you by next week.
By next week ..Ehn…no vex, I’ll pay you next week.
Not because of that, although that hurts and really stings.
But the worst has been how fast I’m becoming stingy.
Everything now is one plus one and two plus two.
From food to clothes to even my perfume.
Lol…which perfume? I don’t buy again.
(Calculating) If I buy now, I go broke again.
So I save the money because of fear to lose it .
My friend tells me he’s broke, and I say I’m shattered.
That’s how my mind now works, saving every crumb.
As work no dey and money dey hardly come.
I Just dey save, dey save, dey lose my sense.
Saying it’s frugality, just to console myself.
When people ask me for money, I just stop smiling.
I start frowning so they can go and let me bury my crumbs.
But the more I save, the more I lack.
Just saving my crumbs while losing my mind.
Losing myself trying to save that extra dime.
That extra dime which I think will make me a better man cos not having enough has changed me for the worse.

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